grady interal thoughts..chapter....five?

grady went to his room, and thought alot about what he was doing in this program. sure, it saved lives, but he HAD no life at all. it seemed a little ridiculous to him; he decided it must have been better to be a completely mindless zombie, just roaming the countryside scouring for flesh. and he longed to join these people, but he felt he had a duty to do. but when was that duty done? when had grady himself done enough to say, "i'm finished, ive accomplished all that i need to". maybe he was ready for retirement. he knew that the project heads of DBW would 'put him down' before they let him see what it was like to roam free. he was too dangerous; a thinking zombie?
and he was lonely. it had been so long since he had been received into the arms of another. so long in fact that he couldnt imagine the sensation, even though he dreamt about it. in his dreams, the sensual, passionate part of his mind was replaced with something that felt more generic and plastic. still he longed.
grady laid back on the bed he rarely used for sleeping. sleeping to him was something to pass the time, not to get rest, because he didnt need it like humans did. he looked around his room at the stale green color of the walls and the desk he never used. he admired the shape the shadow on the ceiling had made from the lamp, the curve reminding him of a crescent moon.